I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
