I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Randomize
