Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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