physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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