break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
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