I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Just pee around me
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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