your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Randomize
