know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
