He is an equal opportunity slut.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
