my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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