dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
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