Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
