arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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