hotel room ftw
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
