some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
