i would punch a child for taco bell
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
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