Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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