two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
