HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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