Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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