Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Randomize