happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize