i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Randomize
