Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
