I'm jealous of your bromance
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
