There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
