the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
