Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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