I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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