who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
