This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
