I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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