your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Randomize
