My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize
