I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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