This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
