wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
