Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
lol hangovers are for mortals.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
