we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
