awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
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