I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
operation harelip BJ is a go
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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