HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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