Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
