If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
