she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
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