I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
