marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
We're like a lot better than the average bears
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
