is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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