sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
