New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Randomize
