i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Randomize
